Need Validation?

Need validation.

It is 2018.  And for many the world is a challenging place. People seem more judgemental and when they try to stand up for themselves they are made fun of and ganged up upon when what is needed is validation.  The situation feels contradictory to what we, at The Society for Recovering Doormats are working so diligently to overcome. (more…)

By | 2018-01-15T17:10:48+00:00 January 1st, 2018|Miscellaneous mattiness|0 Comments

Break the cycle of self-blaming.

Feeling worthy All humans are flawed and have needs. Except the narcissist. Don’t believe me?  Just ask one. They’ll laundry list their super powers while pointing out and embellishing our weaknesses. Belittling and negating others is their specialty. Reducing another to an unworthy pile of insignificance; their primary goal.

Narcissists, or ‘A’ Listers as we refer to them here at The Society for Recovering Doormats, are dangerous personalities, especially for people pleasing doormats. They are toxic to approval addicts because we’re the first to accept and internalize the terrible lies they proclaim. We think we need their love and approval and validate their vicious, self-serving talk as truth.  But giving credence to their warped views, renders us ashamed and unworthy.

Break the cycle of self-blaming now! The next time you’re feeling too needy and less than the wonderful person you are, remember:  it’s not you!  Consider instead the company you’re keeping.  Chances are they are an ‘all-about-themselves ‘A’ Lister.  

You can’t change them but have a choice to disassociate.  If this isn’t feasible because of life circumstances then disengage with them mentally and emotionally,  Do not give them the power to steal your worthiness. It is every person’s birthright.

By | 2016-07-16T17:08:24+00:00 July 16th, 2016|Miscellaneous mattiness|8 Comments

Summer Event Schedule

Calling all Florida Doormats:

I’m very excited for my first TV interview!  If you live in Florida, or are in the area, please come be a part of the studio audience during the taping.  See poster below  for details then call 561-536-1687 to RSVP.

Use this one for FB8_n See the promotional video at https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2FWXELTV42%2Fvideos%2F10154305469003447%2F&show_text=0&width=560

 

 

By | 2016-07-03T13:15:30+00:00 July 3rd, 2016|"My Life as a Doormat" Book|0 Comments

Today I will take care of me. End of story.

 

If it brings you joy, say yes. If it doesn’t, say no.  Sometimes it isn’t possible sticking with a  cut and dry answer, but many times it is just this simple.  Negating people and situations you know guarantee misery is a vital part of self care. 

Self care isn’t selfish;  it’s necessary even if it means disappointing others.  Slipping back into people pleasing mode is always a real possibility  for recovering doormats, so  before saying ‘yes’ to anybody, consider first, if you’re saying ‘yes’ to yourself as well.  

The ‘Today I will take care of me’  mug is on sale NOW.  http://www.cafepress.com/thesocietyforrecoveringdoormats/12745079
Today.

By | 2015-11-20T17:41:09+00:00 November 20th, 2015|Miscellaneous mattiness|10 Comments

The Reviews Are In!

Five Stars

Loren, November 30, 2014

The characters are entertaining and the writing clever, light and witty. Manhattan is a great backdrop then and now for hope-filled dreamers willing to work around life in a vast island of anonymity. The story of Rose unfolds as an adventure as she experiences life in a big city filled with the day to day challenges of just paying the bills. Challenging herself, we feel her deep disappointments and personal achievements as Rose discovers who she is! LOVE!

Five Stars

Margaret Painter, November 28, 2014

Great read with the kind of wisdom everyone can relate to.

5.0 out of 5 Stars

Mitch P. November 12, 2014

This book stirred up so many memories for me. Its written from the heart, but also with so much humor and originality. Please tell me this is just the beginning of a series. I’m emotionally invested in Rose and her journey. This is a book for all ages and walks of life because you WILL find a part of yourself in it!

Five Stars

Robin R,  December 7, 2014
 

Ivy takes you on a heartfelt journey filled with all kinds of ‘doormat’ challenges and leaves you wanting more with each chapter. I could not put the book down! I got so immersed in the book while at the hairdresser, that I forgot to eat lunch, wondering what was going to happen next with each character. So easy to read and follow. Ivy is such a talented writer and you will enjoy this book from start to finish. A real winner! Congratulations Ivy on such a tremendous accomplishment!

If you’ve read My Life as a Doormat please post a review on Amazon.

By | 2018-01-17T14:14:18+00:00 December 1st, 2014|"My Life as a Doormat" Book|2 Comments