Stress Triggers

Button pushersWe all know people who are masters at pushing our buttons. Most are family members and close friends. They aren’t toxic but cause enormous stress. They’re well-meaning but their good intentions are counterproductive to our needs and elevate our stress level.

Knowing WHO these people are, then keeping a safe distance (especially in stressful situations) is one way to manage their good intentions.

By |2016-08-16T10:25:12-04:00August 16th, 2016|Miscellaneous mattiness|5 Comments

Summer Event Schedule

Calling all Florida Doormats:

I’m very excited for my first TV interview!  If you live in Florida, or are in the area, please come be a part of the studio audience during the taping.  See poster below  for details then call 561-536-1687 to RSVP.

Use this one for FB8_n See the promotional video at



By |2016-07-03T13:15:30-04:00July 3rd, 2016|"My Life as a Doormat" Book|0 Comments

Stress, Anxiety and Depression


One of the biggest challenges of people pleasing, approval addicts is saying ‘no’ because we don’t want to let anyone down.  Instead of speaking our truth and letting our needs known, we accommodate.  We wind up in uncomfortable situations, surrounded by people we don’t want to be around, doing things we’re not interested in. We appease others because disappointing anyone terrifies us.  We want everyone to be happy, and negate our own personal happiness in the process.

We may be unaware of the tremendous price we’re paying by being a ‘yes person.’ Stress, anxiety and depression are byproducts of people pleasing.  By avoiding conflict at all costs we might stave off a disagreement. But by keeping the peace we cause a damaging war inside ourselves.

Please remember this the next time you say yes when you really mean no. Or stay silent when you need to speak up. Stress and anxiety

By |2016-06-28T22:13:58-04:00June 28th, 2016|Miscellaneous mattiness|0 Comments

10 Benefits of Ditching Doormat Behavior

10 Benefits of ditching doormat behavior Admitting you have doormat tendencies  or full blown doormatism is the first step of becoming a recovering doormat.  CONGRATULATIONS.  In case you need further incentive to remove toxic people and situations from your life and stand up and speak out, I hope this 10 benefits of ditching doormat behavior  inspires you.

By |2015-12-20T14:01:43-05:00December 20th, 2015|Miscellaneous mattiness|0 Comments

Three Years and Still Standing

Today I’m celebrating the third year anniversary of The Society for Recovering Doormats. Many thanks to all who visit, share and promote .  Thanks to your viewership we are stronger than ever.  Many have told me how much my page has helped them grow and heal. Dear friends,  it is a very symbiotic relationship , as I too have grown and appreciate each and everyone of you beyond words.

Love, Rose Gardner;  founding member, creator, and admin.still standing

By |2015-10-23T18:21:42-04:00October 23rd, 2015|Miscellaneous mattiness|2 Comments

People Pleasing is an Addiction.

People pleasing is an addiction just like drug, food and alcohol dependency.  The difference is approval addicts seek out people for their fix. People pleasing is at the core of every self esteem issue.  The people pleasing, approval addict uses acceptance (or non acceptance) of others to determine their self worth and feel loved.  The approval addict compromises or negates their own needs and moral compass.  This behavior enables others to treat approval addicts like a doormat and the people pleaser, accepts it. And worse: believes they deserve it.

The first step to recovery is admitting  you have this addiction.  Once you own that, recovery from people pleasing can begin.  Awareness of YOUR needs and making that your priority will slowly replace the need to please others to feel loved.  You will begin to love yourself, and that is a wonderful feeling.   people pleaser

By |2015-09-10T13:35:31-04:00September 10th, 2015|Miscellaneous mattiness|26 Comments

Beware The Narcissist.


Narcissists are self-serving, master manipulators,  preying on good-hearted, kind people like doormats. The best way to deal with narcissists is to avoid them.  If that’s not an option, then please realize everything they say and do is about THEM.  These peeps are agenda driven, and use doormats for their emotional and physical dumping ground.   In a word – BEWARE!

By |2015-05-06T10:47:56-04:00May 6th, 2015|Miscellaneous mattiness|86 Comments

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