If you’re a too-nice-for-your-own-good people pleaser it’s feasible you may have a narcissist or two in your life. Or circling. Feeling manipulated or controlled by a certain person, or group? (more…)
Four years ago today, I began my site on Facebook. A few months later I expanded to this blog site. In late November of 2014 My Life as a Doormat, a novel I’d spent 10 years developing, was published.
In 2015 I started my book tour, many signings and events at Barnes and Nobles in Florida. I also opened an on-line-store on Cafe Press. I’m a little technology challenged, but by some miracle by the end of 2015 I managed to get onto most social media platforms. I also began work on my second novel; a sequel to My Life as a Doormat.
During 2016 I continued touring in Florida, and included New Jersey, New York City and Asheville North Carolina. August’s highlight was being interviewed on a PBS TV show called Between The Covers. Since I was an actor long before writing, I was very excited to do the show, and my interest for getting back into ‘show biz’ renewed.
So here I am, 4 years, a book, and 70, 400 followers later, wondering what to do next?
Many thanks to all sharing my vision and supporting my journey.
Calling all North Carolina doormats!
I’ll be at Barnes & Noble on October 15th. See below for details.
I’m so excited for my up-coming book event at Barnes & Noble in Asheville North Carolina on Saturday October 15th at 2:00PM, If you’re in the area please stop by and say hello!
3 South Tunnel Road
Asheville, NC 28805
“Please join us in welcoming author Rose Gardner who will be discussing and signing her book My Life as a Doormat. In this fictionalized biography, it is 1980 and naïve Rose has moved to New York to pursue her acting career. Anxious and uncertain, Rose must learn to stand up and speak for herself — the rallying cry of The Society for Recovering Doormats!”
Why do we feel terrible when we begin standing up for ourselves?
People pleasers are so use to staying silent, accepting abusive and critical verbal abuse that speaking our mind feels unnatural and uncomfortable. Going along with the general consensus, and not making waves was our MO for so long we believed this to be normal.
During recovery from doormatism, it’s hard to speak our truth. But we must learn how to despite possible residual negative feelings. The moment the words are spoken we may start traveling down the river of doubt. Then perhaps, turn in ourselves, beating our self up with false beliefs of unworthiness. And then our most self destructive behavior: forgetting WHY we spoke our truth in the first place. Forgetting we have the right to defend ourselves without guilt, shame or concern if we’ve upset our abuser is detrimental.
The good news is: our level of uncomfortableness fades the more we practice self care.
Stand up, speak out without guilt or shame.